Kirkton skenks rejoice: For Tourists

If this is yir first visit then, welcome my friends, to the Skenkville that is Kirkton.

May yir visit be full o' fun and mirth.

Tae git tae Kirkton tak a bus fae the toon, the 18 or 19 (above) will drap yi aff right in the scummy centre o' oor beloved scheme. Quality. Yir aboot a pund twenty though, jist tae get on the bus these days. Ken, it's a pure rip aff aye. But if yi claim disability allowance fae the social then yil get a pass tae git on buses fir fuck all. Maistly abody in Kirkton's on the disabilty so when yir srtollin aboot the streets just stop any random an ask them the best way tae go aboot gettin on it. Thir ah pure experts so thil no mind tellin yi ah aboot it.

Eh Kirkton is definitley the place tae be, an if yir a tourist tae these parts then here's some yaysful info fur yir ain benefit -

Ectos are sometimes fur sale roond the back o' Asda. Phone Tam Tamsan on 08976776660 for valleys. He does a good deal ken. Jizo Joe ayeways has smack if yir intae chasin the dragon. Like maist folk fae Kirkton are, so again just stop any random an ask how tae get a hud o' Jizo Joe. Yil be sorted in nae time. Broonie also has rocky an pollen now and then but he's pure pricey as fuck and dina expect a lay on. 098667755321. He shuts up shop efter seevin so dina go phonin efter that or yil git a pure tun o' abuse, ken. Naebody in Kirkton sells coke for obvious reasons, thirs just nae demand fir it cos nae cunt can fuckin afford it. Try the Ferry for ah they posh drugs.

Lastly some advice...

Hussys are rife in Kirkton, an as yi ken the best kin be fund right here on this very site. But if yir ever in Kirkton yil be surroonded beh manky slappers. An the ah want tae git up the duff, ken. So they kid git mair social money. So mind an protect yirsel. Tae mak share yi keep yir sel bairn-less, play the game doon below fir some shootin practice. Once yiv mastered it, an are shit hot at aiming, then it's safe tae approach a Kirkton Skenk.

Catch ya 'ron...

The Bint Wha Runs The Show.

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Support the skenks!!!

Show yir love for Kirkton and it's whores. Click here tae buy a t-shirt, wear it wi pride. Or get yir granny a mug. Yi ken any Kirkton native will love yi fir it.

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