An Introduction...

IMPORTANT MESSAGE!!!

If you have come to this page looking for delightful kirkton hookers then the following points must be addressed:

1) You are a filthy fucking pervert.
2) You clearly have a pathetic sex life and quite often wank to internet porn.
3) You have unfortunately broken the law by visitng this illegal site and now have spyware installed on your hard drive which will alert the authorities of your IP address and allow them to trace you down then arrest you and possibly detain you in Bell Street HQ. (Don't worry, it will be fun, you will meet the creme de la creme of Dundee in the cells.)

NB - Deleting your Internet History will not make any difference.

Have a nice day!

R.I.P the Kirkton Skenks

Gone but not forgotten...

What became of the skenks?

It has been reported via secret methods of reporting that the now infamous Prostitutes of Kirkton made excessive amounts of money through their online brothel, which indeed only ran for a few short months over the cold winter of 2006. This means the punters of Dundee are either very rich or very desperate (the latter is rumoured to be the case with statistics from Provy Loans Ltd showing that levels of debt have strangely risen in all parts of the city, causing hardship and poverty to many).

The four skenks still have a major following and indeed some 'fans' turned to stalking the stunning darlings (but this is still under investigation by the authorities so no more can be said on the matter at the moment). For those who are still mourning the sad loss of the four sluts and their pimpstress, please be reassured that they are all living in happiness somewhere and have moved on with their lives. Read on to update yourself...

Jilted Jacqui

Jilted Jacqui realised anal wasn't her only speciality and moved to Thailand where banana trees grow in abundance. Happily, the fruit from these trees gave her plenty hands-on experience for her next career move. She will soon be auditioning for a part in Deep Throat 7, once she perfects her swallowing technique.

Furry Fraggle

The Furry Fraggle blew all her earnings on breast implants and as a result lived on bread and water for some time. She then regretably shaved off her infamous bush and sold it to a man who could not grow a beard. She later married this charming hunk who happily did not mind surviving on a staple diet of bread.

Ashley The Born Again Virgin

Ashley, Born Again Virgin, finally found love in a spunky looking ex chippendale dancer who has a large following in Sydney. Ashley eventually moved there and married this man. It is hoped they will produce children soon.

PC Gingo
PC Gingo tired of her filthy antics in Bell St HQ and satisfied that she had corrupted enough of Dundee's young criminals, she eventually moved out of the city. She now resides in unknown territories and takes a special interest in taming pussys which shoot their load.

The Pimpstress

The Pimpstress aka The Bint Who Runs The Show, has sadly not been seen since the authorities were alerted about the brothel. It is rumoured she has joined a group of terrorists who are plotting to brainwash the British public mainly through national media. They then plan to force the western world to invade foriegn countries, drain their resources, kill their children and safeguard their own interests in the process. They will then claim to fight invisible enemies, whilst declaring loudly "but it's all in the name of freedom!". Yes, she will be sadly missed.